Tuesday, November 2, 2010
Am I Strong Enough?
Yes and sorry, this is another post about the job situation. I promise someday my blogs will be fun again and filled with all of our family events. Right now though, this is what our family is dealing with and this is what is in the forefront of our minds and the topic of most conversations. Anyways, after talking to several people yesterday and another today, I feel better about the town of Alliance. I think I mentioned that yesterday. The people were very friendly and helpful and loved the town. However, it brought a new question to my mind. Am I strong enough? During the conversations things like single parenting, living with your phone, giving up family time and a hard four or five years were mentioned. The one that got me the most though, was from a lady whose husband had retired a few years ago from the railroad. She said that it takes a strong woman. I have to be strong enough to raise the family and hold things together while Michael is out earning the money. I have to be understanding and strong willed. It is not for the weak and faint of heart. I have to admit, I'm not sure that I am that person that she said I would have to be. It makes me nervous that I will be the one not able to handle our new situation if in fact we go to the railroad. Am I strong enough? I don't want to be a single parent. I don't want my life to be determined by the next phone call. I hope that if we end up there, I can be that person, but I have doubts and worries. Once again, we will be required to act on faith. Faith that Heavenly Father knows better than we do and that He will give us the strength to be what we don't think we can be. I will have to be strong not only for the children, but also for Michael. He will need assurance that all is well at home. I hope that Heavenly Father will come to my rescue and raise me up to where I need to be so that I can be to my family who they need me to be.