Friday, October 10, 2008
Have you ever had moments in your life when you just walk around wondering what just happened? That's how I have been feeling the last few days. Wednesday Michael came home with some not so good news. It came as a shock and a huge let down. All that we have been working for seems all of the sudden so out of reach. We were so close to our goals and now it seems everything has been taken away from us. I have been walking around in a daze wondering what just happened, why it happened and what we are saupposed to do now. I don't know how to feel. I'm angry, I'm sad, I'm depressed, I'm very tired. I want to have faith and trust and feel reassurance but it all seems very slow coming. If I didn't have children and responsibilities, I would probably just curl up in a ball and stay there for days. I kow it sounds like drama, and it probably is, but right now it's real drama. Of course everything in life happens for a reason and we don't know what's in store for us, but the wondering and struggles in the meantime are very overwhelming. I'm sure things will settle down soon and we will all be all right. I just react emotionally. Why do people have to be so selfish? Why do they have to break their promises? I sure hope a change of heart happens and maybe all of this will go away. In the meantime, remember to be honest and kind. Look for those who need a smile and be aware of how much your actions affect those around you. We can spread good in this world or we can spread sadness. Even if we have been wronged, let's spread the good and see if it will help erase the sadness we sometimes feel in our own hearts. So to all of you who read this, I love you. You mean so much to me. All of you that I have invited to read this blog, have touched my life in many positive ways. Your love has changed our lives and continues to change it. Thank you for all you do.